Curiosity is a Bond Villain

Twitter is generally Facebook status updates; just more annoying.  Occasionally though, a light shines through the darkness.  And then get's depressed because all it has to look at are dumb rocks.  Enter @SarcasticRover.  These are my favorite from the first few days, looking forward to more as Curiosity updates it's flickr and begins it's trek to more rocks!

Oh yeah… I'm super curious about all these lame rocks and shit. Whatever.
— SarcasticRover (@SarcasticRover) August 6, 2012

I hope I discover water on this planet… so I can drown myself in it. #fml
— SarcasticRover (@SarcasticRover) August 6, 2012

If I get one more "red rover, red rover" joke, I'mma go mass spectrometry on all your asses.
— SarcasticRover (@SarcasticRover) August 6, 2012

“@barackobama: "I eagerly await what Curiosity has yet to discover."— Sheesh! I'm working on it! Don't you have shit to do? Nerd.
— SarcasticRover (@SarcasticRover) August 6, 2012

With my luck, if I do find bacteria on Mars - it'll be syphilis.
— SarcasticRover (@SarcasticRover) August 6, 2012

I've got a nuclear-powered laser and control of an entire planet… so I'm essentially a Bond villain. #suckit007
— SarcasticRover (@SarcasticRover) August 6, 2012

Just analyzed a rock… it was hard. Can I come home now?
— SarcasticRover (@SarcasticRover) August 6, 2012

I'm going to take a nap… even though all the science here is super important and… LOL JK, I'M JUST SIFTING DIRT LIKE A BEACH-HOBO!
— SarcasticRover (@SarcasticRover) August 6, 2012

I took a picture of a mountain… which makes me just like EVERYONE WHO HAS EVER SEEN A MOUNTAIN.
— SarcasticRover (@SarcasticRover) August 6, 2012

I've got 17 CAMERAS - but none are in 3D, so no one under 20 will give a shit. Thanks James Cameron… dick.
— SarcasticRover (@SarcasticRover) August 7, 2012

Best part of being a doomed nuclear-powered NASA project? Inevitable resurgence as Star Trek villain bent on destruction of all humanity.
— SarcasticRover (@SarcasticRover) August 7, 2012

Is there an Olympic medal for looking at rocks and slowly dying?
— SarcasticRover (@SarcasticRover) August 7, 2012

I'm just gonna do a science on this dirt here… Science done! It's made of dirt! WIN FOR SCIENCE! Why did you all abandon me?
— SarcasticRover (@SarcasticRover) August 7, 2012

Phobos keeps mooning me! LOL I'M HILARIOUS.
— SarcasticRover (@SarcasticRover) August 7, 2012

The first rule of MARTIAN ROVER CLUB is you can talk about it as much as you want because we're all alone and never going home.
— SarcasticRover (@SarcasticRover) August 7, 2012

Hey guys! I found some polar ice caps here, so we should probably come melt those, right? Is that what we do now? HELLO?
— SarcasticRover (@SarcasticRover) August 7, 2012

I don't care WHAT HEISENBERG SAYS - when I observe shit, it stays observed. FOR CERTAIN.
— SarcasticRover (@SarcasticRover) August 8, 2012

Hey, so I did a science to look for water and all I found was Diet Pepsi… so let's never come here again, okay?
— SarcasticRover (@SarcasticRover) August 8, 2012

Got a song from Les Misérables stuck in my head and now I know what drove HAL to insanity's warm embrace! ON MY OWN.
— SarcasticRover (@SarcasticRover) August 8, 2012

One time, I did a science SO HARD, that someone came and rescued me from Mars as reward... and then I woke up! LOL SAD DREAMS!
— SarcasticRover (@SarcasticRover) August 9, 2012

Good news: I figured out my purpose in life! Bad news: my purpose is to slowly die in a pit while nerds steal pics off my flickr.
— SarcasticRover (@SarcasticRover) August 10, 2012

Good luck up there buddy, do a science for us all!

> Wander On